At the end I cried not because it was sad..which it was, but because it brought back a painful memory.
Our "Mama's"
"Mama's" is a pet name parents give their daughters, which means like little mama, sweetie, darling..you get the picture.
Well our mama's was beautiful and we were crazy about her.
We adopted her from a animal shelter and she was perfect.
WAY hyper, sweet and just beautiful.
She was half yellow lab and half husky.
And when Nick saw her cool eyes, one was brown one was blue, he said " She's meant to be ours, she's half you and half me."
About a month after bringing her home I noticed she was overly clumsy and walked funny.
3 different doctors later and a call to the animal shelter where we adopted her got us a verdict.
All her siblings had died of distemper, she lived but it crippled her neurologically.
She would lose more and more use of her hind quarters and not live over a year if she even made it a year.
Many doctors advised us to put her down, because her care would be costly and EXTREMELY time consuming.
We didn't care, we had a little girl and we loved her.
Mama's wasn't her real name her name was Aspyn Corkill.
Aspyn was spoiled beyond belief.
She got water therapy several times a week if not daily.
We gave her therapy for her legs so they would not atrophy.
I had to bang her sides several times a day to prevent mucus from collecting in her lungs and OH she wore diapers.
Nick and I would buy adult diapers make a hole for her tail and VOILA! Doggie Diapers.
Anyway she was so spoiled that we bought her a REAL toddler bed for Christmas...couldn't stand that she slept on the floor.
Of course she had her blankie and a mountain of lovies but still...it WAS the floor.
When Nick and I watched television we would place her between us and make a hug sandwich with her...she loved it!
On her 1 year birthday which was the same month as Nicks..March.
We bought them both a cake.
It said "Happy Birthday Nick & Apsyn".
I was even naughty and gave her a piece.
I knew she didn't have long with us so her favorite treat was Fritos..I was a naughty mom to give them to her.
Aspyn was going to be part of my wedding...one of my flower girls.
One flower girl was to pull Aspyn in a wagon decorated with flowers while two other flowers girls walked behind to make sure she didn't fall out.
By this time she had NO control of her hind legs.
She was walked with the assistance of a hind brace we concocted to walk her.
Well Aspyn didn't make it to our wedding, she died about 2 months before.
(Now you know why I had so many flower girls...I had three)
Sadly, I wasn't present when they put her to sleep, Nick went, his cousin David was sweet enough to be with him.
I just couldn't go.
To this day feel horribly selfish for not going and just terrible I couldn't be there to give her kisses goodbye.
Nick and I looked for a Pet Cemetery to bury her, can you believe they were all full!?
We had her cremated and she is still with us in a little cedar box.
When Nick picked up her ashes he hid her in back of a closet.
He knew it would kill me to see her ashes and in the middle of us getting ready for our wedding he knew I couldn't take it.
I found her a few months into our marriage.
I cried.
I still have all her lovies and blankies in the attic.
Can't get myself to toss them out.
And believe me...those toys are RATTY!
She LOVED chewing her some lovies, yet can't bare to separate myself from them.
Nick and I still talk about her because she truly was the best dog.
She would of been great with the boys, we just know she would of.
And watching "Marley and Me" made Nick and I feel like we have been robbed.
Robbed of having been able to enjoy the perfect dog, perfect dog for us, perfect dog for our boys.
Though silly as it may seem we think Apsyn was a test for us.
A test of how not everything in life is perfect or what one expects.
A few years later we had our boys who came with challenges, challenges we felt ready for in a way.
Our lovely Aspyn.
She would of just turned 9 this past March.
Can you tell we still miss her?
2 comments:
awww, are ya trying to make me cry???? What a sweet face! I am sorry you guys had to loose her!
I think this is a perfect example of a Blessing from God. She was blessed because God brought you to her...she was able to live a life full of love and lots of attention. She was spoiled rotten, and was treated like your own child. Who knows what her life would've been like if you and Nick hadn't come along and saved her! And in return, she gave you her love! What a blessing indeed!!
P.S. I read this post before but was too heartbroken to post a comment!
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